what can i say about it all

you don't know how crazy you made me
i can't stop thinking about it
is this real or just my dream? because it just me that feel it
and consider about this
u just sitting there and looking forward for everything
and never care even just a bit about it....
i'm just so stupid and got into too much
and let myself be like this begger
people change nothing keep same
everything is fickle !!!

there is no lasting thing in this whole world
everyone just seems overwhelmed with their own life their own bussiness
the circumstance makes me realize i shouldn't got into it
it's all my fault that i put all my hope in you
and can't imagine what will i be without you here

you are the tone in my music
you are the humidity in my air

God, he means too much for me.. so much over.. should i let go of him?? and lost another thing that worthy for me?? or can i just say i wasn't born for love?? yupp that's the right word for it.. everytime when i get into it, that's the time i hurt myself over and over again.. and kill the good thing that happened to me... fall again, breaking again, bleeding again..

God if you hear me please let me have the endless one and won't make me fall again.. can God?? i need someone to complete my life.. just so hard to find it ): i'm not in the rush but i can't stand loneliness.. not talk no words come out from this lips.. the worst thing in this world..

God let me have one
please
let me ....

i'm surrender
and overwhelmed into my sorrow and my burden
it keeps in my head all the time
everytime i breath i feel hurt again

noone else can make me feel this.. only him and him and forever him
just him just him just him...
i'm acting insane.. out of control.. and unpredictable..

i can't show it all in front of him.. i just hide it.. the time i'm in my room i start to act insane.. only me and God know how crazy and stupid that thing.. it's all not like my dream..
white horse , prince, flowers, sweet words everywhere, love is in the air..
just a fairytale which never gonna happen..

or is it just the matter of time?
how long i have to wait for this feeling come true?
does it take forever? or never?

forever never .. forever never..

punish me
punish me
punish me because got into too much God
i'm not a good kid ):

):


created by Jessica * true story *